Housing is a scary variable as an agoraphobic adult.

My family said a few months back that they hoped i’d find somewhere to live by spring, which is soon. But I have to wait to be approved for long term disability before I can apply to the assisted housing I hope to apply for. And because my doctors didn’t send the right information the first time, I haven’t received any percentage of my income since end of December, and finally it’s being reviewed. I was supposed to hear yesterday if i got approved or not, but didn’t hear anything.

And the HR connection i have, who said he’d help me find these assisted housing options, is on vacation until March 5th, so even if i hear back this week – i can’t do anything about it until he’s back.

And what if i don’t get approved.?

Then what?

then i will live on my savings, which i originally saved for school (and am already dipping into). And if i have to pay rent and afford groceries, they will not last me a very long time. And i’m still not at a place where i’m able to run errands or even see friends – how would i survive on my own at this point. I guess i’d just have to deal somehow. I don’t know.

I was just updating my mom, and my dad just blurted out that I had to be out by April 1st specifically and looked at me like i was crazy for not being more prepared, like he’d kick me out if i don’t have something set by then.

and my dad is a good dad, I don’t think he would just let me be homeless. but he looked at me like he would.

it’s too scary to think about right now.